Our Authentic Self

I have gained a lot of life experiences for being only 34 years old. Life has taught me many things, but one of my greatest achievements has been becoming my true self again after long years of struggle. I learned is that being authentic is essential to loving ourselves and being loved! Being authentic means always being true to yourself and others. It also means being unique and standing up for yourself, no matter what!

Zig Ziglar says: "You cannot consistently act in a manner that is inconsistent with who you really are!", and it's so true! Why lie to yourself and about yourself? Someone will eventually find out, and trust will be lost.
Yes, truth can hurt sometimes. However dishonesty will cause chain reactions of unknown magnitude that carry from you to friends and on to their friends. Suddenly you find yourself with a bad reputation that affects your life and even your work. When I say "bad reputation" I mean a reputation of being dishonest in your dealings, being two-faced, and suffering from lack of "backbone". "I'd rather be hated for who I am than loved for who I am not!" is another favorite quote of mine. Even if you are feared or disliked, truth and authenticity always demand respect, at the very least!

Lack of authenticity reflects itself in our family life, friendships and in our work. My family and friends know that I am authentic. I say what I do and do what I say. I have their back! That's how it should be. If I commit to something, I usually do it, unless there are unwanted or unexpected circumstances that force me to do otherwise. Work is a little bit of a different story. Most people work jobs that they don't really like. They do it for the money and benefits, and because it somewhat fits their talents. I feel that you're really only authentic in your work as long as you love at least part of it. I am much into the healing arts and while I am quite talented in being a Developmental Therapist, lately I have found that it isn't a 100% perfect fit for me. Believe it, or not, I have been told that I am too kind! Well the healing professions have many facets and I will remain within that professional niche. But I will look further into Massage Therapy, Reiki, Crystals and Herbalism, while continuing to write. These are my "true to myself" talents. The creative arts are just as much part of myself, however, to chose beauty over healing would be foolish. Even though my many talents can be used in different ways, only the healing arts would really make for an authentic "Petra-Profession". Only when the profession matches your authentic self, will you truly love your job!

There is so much more I could say, but for now, in conclusion:
Acting in accordance to your authentic self is liberating! And I love it!

Nurturing REAL Friendships

I wrote earlier that I have taken some time to nurture friendships that are important to me. I have always been a good friend to people I care about. I have received calls and literal cries for help and went to friends houses in as little as 5 minutes. I take my friendships VERY seriously! But often, in the past, my commitment to help people borderlined self-sacrifice. And people not only used, but abused my goodwill. That type of friendship is one-sided. It isn't "real".

The friendships that I now try to nurture, are those that are mutually benefiting. They bring harmony to all friends involved. For the first time in a long time, I have friends that will share their home, their food, their advice, their feelings and activities and other friends with me, without asking anything in return. Just the same way I have always acted toward others. These friends are rare and few in between. Most of those rare friends I have live hours away from me. Now, I have a few that are close-by, yet again.

I finally feel like I belong to a circle of friends once more that values my presence, and what I do and say, just for the fact that I am being me, and that they enjoy me being around. I so appreciate that! I hadn't been told AND shown in a long time that I am being loved for who I really am. And indeed, I can be myself with them. I don't have to walk around as if on egg-shells, just because I might offend someone or because they might feel that I am weird. It gives me a strong sense of freedom and belonging... two major human desires! Being able to be yourself in the midst of others is so powerful! It builds trust, because there is truth in what you do and say! It's the greatest asset in any relationship. "You cannot consistently act in a way that is inconsistent with who you really are", as Zig Ziglar would say. However, if you are yourself, others will know and appreciate it. It is even more powerful, when you are yourself in kindness! Knowing that a friend has your back, and you have theirs, even in tough times, creates a wonderful bond! If you can go months without talking, because life gets busy, and then come right back to another 4 hr conversation - that's so awesome! To get hugs when you need them - God I love it!

I love you so much, my REAL friends! You know who you are!