I used to be really shy... so shy that I would not easily walk up to people to talk, or make friends easily. I remember a time when my American (now Ex-) husband asked me to call the Air Force base in Germany to inquire about something (I am a German-American citizen). I was so afraid to make a mistake speaking English that he had to push me so hard to do it that I broke out in tears...
Later, in America, I had a hard time bringing up the courage to apply for jobs, but I slowly became a little more confident and started working part-time and interacting with people more. Eventually I got into retail management and sales, then another position as a manufacturing technician making microchips. I took on great responsibility, working with engineering and saving my company thousands of Dollars, preventing manufacturing defects, that would not have been discovered otherwise, and suggesting process improvements. Unfortunately, that company went out of business. I needed to look for something else, and one day, my former spouse drove me to a local call center to apply there. I ended up working in that call center for almost 8 years and I became a much more confident people person. Still, it wasn't quite the confident person I am today.
Stage fright had always been an issue for me. I love to sing, and not bad either, and I love to share opinions and advice, but getting in front of people to speak or sing, scared the living daylights out of me. I still get very nervous. I found that it's not because of the people, or necessarily the information or song being presented, not even the fear of making mistakes, but the fear of rejection!
Just a couple of weeks ago, I agreed to join friends in going to a karaoke bar. My friends know I love to sing, and that I am at least somewhat talented. I finally I came to the conclusion that it doesn't matter, if other people like what you have to say or what you want to present. It does, however, matter what you think of yourself, and whether you can overcome your own insecurities! Being able to go out there and be yourself, carry yourself well and look people in the eyes creates such a sense of freedom! What's even more interesting, is that once I got over my fear of rejection, I no longer sang halfheartedly, but out loud and with passion! I sounded SO much better! LOL When I made a mistake with the lyrics, I started laughing and just kept going. People joined me in singing, and the crowd cheered. Most of all I cheered inside! I no longer felt that I would be rejected, regardless of whether I made mistakes. I made it happen, not the crowd!
And life is the same way. We have to take action and MAKE things happen - and not let things happen TO us! We have to take that leap of faith! I once heard a saying: "God pushes us to the edge, to see how strong we are. And sometimes he pushes us over the edge, just so we see that we can soar like an eagle!" It is so true! A lot of times it's the fear of fear. We are worried based on the assumption that we might fail. But we may not fail at all! The only wrong step is the one you don't take. Don't let fear hold you back!
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